When I was in the sixth grade, I participated in the spelling bee, a yearly ritual for me throughout elementary school. It was a confirmation to all that I was a smart kid, that I could one day become successful, you know, become someone who spends his free time writing blogs that make less than one cent per post.
This year was unlike the other years and not because I won or anything. I lost. Might have finished in tenth place or so. No, it was different because I had a metal mouth. Said affliction ruined my word pronunciation, like so:
“HAAACK-ey.” Then I spelled it. And again with the pronunciation: HAAACK-ey. Continue reading